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Friday, May 27, 2011

A poem for my Father who died, today.

Sadness
eyes dry like dishes
chipped and cracked from overuse
tears betray you
holding them back betrays me

You have died, and I will miss you
I will long for the father I wished for
And I will ache for the one I had
The imperfect one
the impatient one
the human one.

I will look for you, when I hopefully arrive in Heaven
I will dive into your open arms
smothering you with kisses
the way I never did in real life
because you would have none of that
then.




Monday, May 23, 2011

The colors of Spring







My last energy drink!

I admit it, I have been drinking Monster Energy drinks for more years than I care to admit. Probably 8 or 9. I used them to keep some seriously insane working hours all these years. Tonight I learned my lesson! Anyone who has read my blog for more than a few days knows I have an anxiety disorder, and I mean a serious one! Well here is a recipe for disaster....

Take an extra large energy drink and drink it throughout a 14 hour day, sipping as you see fit.
Do not drink any water, make sure to dehydrate yourself until your legs ache like a toothache.
Feel your heart beating in your ears
Use liberally all the high tech medical equipment you have access to, take your blood pressure and  pulse.
Now, go to the computer, and look up all the symptoms in a symptom checker, online.
Lets see, blood pressure...skyrocketing, pulse racing, legs cramping...what do you come up with?

Yes, you guessed it, I am going to die, right there and now!!! I better drive directly from work to the emergency room....but first I call my friend, Leah, who gives me the slap upside my head I actually needed.

A reality check was in order! I drank 16 ounces of water, which almost instantly stopped the leg cramping.
I took a deep breath and vowed then and there to dump my stash of energy drinks down the sink...which I did!

Yes, I am alive and well. I just got home from work. Here is what I define as insane working hours. I have worked 28 hours in the last two days. I do it on a regular basis. I drive an hour through a forest each way from home to work, and back. That leaves me with about 5 hours to sleep in between.

I work alone, in a group home with developmentally disabled, and physically disabled people. I am responsible for every aspect of their care while I am there, ALONE! It is a physically and mentally demanding job. And today, there were tornado warnings, and a " super cell" going through the town I work in. Stress, much! Rain, hail, wind, green still air, and scared clients. Not fun, at all!


 I am going to devise a way to do it, from now on, without caffeine. That is one thing I know, for sure! Who needs panic on top of all that! But at least I love my job!


Saturday, May 21, 2011

Friday, May 20, 2011

song sung blue - neil diamond

Apple and plum blossoms, today, on a walk around my block



My second favorite photo of the day

My favorite photo of the day

Yes, I know, beautiful...quaint small town....


Thursday, May 19, 2011

A picture blog...because I can, and I will!

I liked the way those branches looked like a bridge


A field of yellow and a red barn, oh and barbed wire...I like it!


My husband, who is such a good sport! He climbed this tree for me!

With the help of this ladder!


A couple of deer on my walk, today

Tom turkey in the forest, today. He kept fanning out, but my camera was too slow to capture it
Hey, sorry, everybody, for my pity party yesterday! Seriously!

 This was my day, today. I went to the cemetery to trim trees with my husband and mother in law. He climbed the tree for me, just so I could take his picture in it. Then we drove to Marshfield, to the forest, so I could take pictures of the flowers. It was a very good day. The deer and turkey were a bonus as we walked. No wood ticks, either!

Al anon, yes, I have gone to meetings. I have read every co-dependent book that looked interesting to me. After we move, I will join, again, I think. Anyway, thank you again, for your kind words.