There is just something wonderful about a Best Friend

I think, all my life, I have made sure to have a best friend. Elementary school, Kindergarten and first grade,  her name was Sharon. She was a year older, she came from a wealthier family, she was the youngest, while I was the oldest. The only thing we probably had in common was our neighborhood. Then we moved away. I moved a lot as a child. My father, being the drunk that he was, guided us through many adventures. Moving, being kicked out of rentals, all that stuff of an alcoholic life.  I, of course, was too young to realize that we were different, in any way. I made friends easily. I have always been lucky like that.

With every move came a different school, in our city. I can count 6 elementary schools, all in the same city. Yes, I knew how to make friends. I was always the new kid.

In fourth grade, I met my best friend, Lynn. She remained someone I cherished throughout High School and beyond. Though our friendship was brief to start, we reunited in junior high, and became fast friends, again. Her household was completely different than mine. She was the youngest child, an afterthought of sorts. Her brothers were married and had families of their own by the time she was a fourth grader. Her parents were older, and she always feared that they would die. The thing is we had more in common. Our sense of humor was compatible. I grew with that friendship, and I think she did too. Then we grew apart. It broke my heart to realize that our friendship was over. It took years and years for me to really even admit that we were no longer friends.

As an adult, I continued to make friends easily. I am proud to say that I have met some wonderful people on this life's journey. While my children were small I related to people with small children. When I divorced,  I surrounded myself with single parents. Our struggles and experiences were similar, and we related to each other without feeling judged.

 One friend, Lori comes to mind. She was bold, and out there. She had three young girls. Her house was always chaotic, and fun. She was bigger than life, bolder than any man, brave and vulnerable at the same time. I remember the day after my husband left me, she knocked on my bedroom window with two mugs of coffee, and got me out of my funk. She knew what to say, where to go, and guided me through one of the toughest times my young life had ever encountered. Through her eyes I began to see myself differently. I was now a single parent, and I had to step it up. We remained friends for years. She finished college and became a teacher. She moved to a small town in northeastern Wisconsin.  I moved back to the city of my birth. She was the maid of honor at my second marriage, to my Jerry. Eventually though we lost touch. I haven't spoken to her for many years. I miss her. I didn't even realize it until I started writing this.

After I moved back to Duluth I became closer to my Mother. She and I became more than mother and daughter, we became best friends. She deserves more than a paragraph, here. She was an amazing woman. She was an artist, and an adventure. I was lucky to have such a relationship. I will compare our friendship to all others. I know that none will ever measure up. Then she died, suddenly. I have written about this before, my terrible time. I was left alone, completely. My house was empty, and I lost my mind for a while.

Something happened, then. I became afraid to get close to anyone. My heart was shattered. Jerry and I repaired our marriage, slowly. He sort of  filled the void. He is in fact a good friend as well as a Husband. But obviously, he is not a girl. It is not the same.

I have a best friend as I write this, although I fear that our friend time is growing less and less. She has had to take on the responsibility of raising her granddaughter. She has no time for friend stuff, now. I love her, dearly. I understand that our friendship will have to take a backseat to circumstance. I will mourn the loss of our time together. I will make an effort to stay in touch. She is worth it, and so am I.

An evening stroll through the cemetery

I came upon an Angel. She has been there since long before I was born. I found her while I walked in the cemetery close to my house. Our first meeting was shortly after I arrived here in Wisconsin. I was sad, the day we met, and I found comfort in her prayer. I visit her often, and delight in her ever changing light.

GPS, a guide to life

My, oh my, let me tell you a story. This story has no ending, like all stories, it is a work in progress. A couple of Black Friday's ago Jerry and I decided to go to Walmart and buy ourselves a GPS. Since we do most of our travelling by auto, we thought it would be a good investment. We opted for a fancy one, with all the updates included, global gas prices, all the bells and whistles that you could ever need.

I must tell you that this was not our first experience with GPS's as we have borrowed other peoples, and tested out a few. We decided to go with a TomTom. We like it very much, although this is not a love story, it is a story of how the GPS is not always the way to go. Let me explain.

One of our first long journeys with the GPS was to Nashua, New Hampshire, to visit my brothers. We decided to take my Dad there for a visit, as he was getting sick. We programed the trip into the screen, and off we went. Being that we live in central Wisconsin it took us through downtown Chicago. No worries, it calculated the traffic, or something, and got us through without as much as a traffic jam. It told us what lane to be in, how fast we were going, if we were speeding, it was reliable. We got so confident that we put away the atlas.

After a long days drive, we decided to stop to sleep, in a Motel. This would be unusual for us, as we have always just driven strait through sleeping while the other drives. My Dad was feeling sick, and we needed to stop and rest, for his sake. We just punched a few buttons on the machine and it gave us the closest motel. We were in Cleveland, Ohio. The Motel was shabby, to say the least. It looked as though it used to be a chain operation which was sold off, and never updated. It looked iffy at best, but my Dad was exhausted, and needed to get out of the car. We slept, fitfully. I am not one to sleep where I feel uncomfortable. This place looked scary to me.

The next morning we punched the nearest restaurant into the GPS and drove to breakfast. It was barely light out, but we could see the neighborhood, now. We turned left and right and reached our destination. The food was okay, nothing to write about. We ate, and then we took off. Our plan was to make it to my brothers that night. The GPS calculated that we could be there in 14 hours, without breaks. No problem, we could make it, if Dad could.

Well into our day, my Dad started to feel very ill. He wanted to pull over at the nearest gas station. We programed it in. We were on the toll way then, and needed to exit for the nearest place. He looked terrible, almost grey in color, and was shaking. Now for those of you who do not know, my Dad was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer. This was before the diagnosis, but he had been diagnosed with diabetes, then. He was new to it, and had no idea how to even give himself insulin shots. He was confused, and instead of eating when he felt shaky, or checking his blood sugar, he would just give himself a little boost of insulin. BAD IDEA! Of course, the GPS took us the long way to the rest stop. Of course, we were all in a panic, that Dad would die on our watch. We finally arrived, and Dad walked to the bathroom, and did whatever he was going to do. I bought orange juice, and demanded that he drink it! I told my Husband that we should take him to an emergency room to get checked out, but my Dad would have no part of it. We went on.

Dad slept the rest of the way to New Hampshire. He got dropped off at my Brother Andy's house, where he always stays, and we proceeded to my Brother Ted's house, where I always stay. I have been to New Hampshire many times, and I do know my way around Nashua, but I used the GPS, just because. Of course it took me an unfamiliar way, in the dark, and I felt unsure, but it got us there. I was glad.

The rest of the trip was just okay. Another family visit, not really fun, but I felt glad to have done this for my Dad, and my brothers. Jerry and I were left to stay in a camper, in my brothers back yard. We went to a few soccer games to cheer on my nephews. We went mini golfing, my second favorite sport. We spent a few hours in Boston, touring the Science Museum. We ate Dunkin Doughnuts almost every morning. We drove around, with the GPS to guide us.

On the way home, my Dad seemed renewed. He had gotten some rest, and was ready to head home. We packed up, and off we went. Dad demanded that we take his way home, instead. We programed the GPS and set the trip. He was tired and sick again by the time we hit New York. We found a Motel, but this time, I demanded a better one! We slept, and got up so early that even Perkins wasn't open yet. 19 hours without a break, to reach our destination, home. Somehow, we made it, but it wasn't pretty. We missed one toll in Chicago, oops! Just .75 cents but, still shameful! Dad insisted we bypass downtown Chicago, and we hit a huge traffic jam.

I titled this post, GPS a guide to life. Here is my humble opinion. Yes, you can program your trip, and listen to the computer voice with all it's advise, but you should use your head, your eyes, and your gut. A trip is supposed to be fun, an adventure. Sometimes the best times are on those back roads that you get lost on. It is not always good to know your arrival time, as you may want to stop and pee. And sometimes when the computer says you have reached your destination, you have no idea where you are. Kind of like life, I suppose.

A walk in the grass...

My dear sweet husband is so generous. He tolerates my silly side, and laughs with me, and not at me. For that I am grateful. He stands by me in my sorrow, and is patient with me in my anger. All that, and a cute butt!

There is more to life that just sitting on the ground

Spring skies

This was the sky today. The first pictures were from my morning walk, the last were the sunset. As my husband said, today..." When in doubt, look up."  Soon the snow will melt, and there will be green grass to lay on. Until then I will just have to look up.

Someone shared this...

One of my friends shared this on Facebook this morning. My back is killing me, because I can never change positions in my bed. My little friend Katie is a bed hog! She shooed the cat off many months ago, and now is attempting to have us all sleep in the closet with him. The "Misery" position is truly the one I relate too, but the "69" cracks up up!