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Friday, April 9, 2010

Do you believe in ghosts?

When I first moved to Neillsville I was recovering from a huge bout of depression. I mean BIG! It took my by storm and changed my life forever. I was hospitalized, drugged, and made to reevaluate my entire life. What I saw, I didn't like, and I worked very hard to bring myself back to health, happiness, and most of all sanity.

The life I left behind certainly wasn't all bad. I had friends, a job, a house which was almost paid for. I needed to leave it all behind to find my health again. I was a ghost. I had no connection to my life.

When I left, I said goodbye to nobody. I didn't let anyone know where I was, and I escaped to the solitude of a small town where nobody knew me, and nobody cared. No one but my husband, with whom I repaired a broken marriage.

Today, I am still recovering from that life lesson. I have just recently let in some of the people that I left behind. It is scary everyday, knowing that I am not the invisible ghost I was. I am out there, a little, at least. It is the truth.

What I learned was that sometimes you have to save yourself. I am lucky to be alive. I rode the dragon and lived to tell about it. I was a ghost and now I am truly alive, well and living in a small town, which I am growing out of.

Thank you my friends, for being there when I needed you. Thank you for welcoming me back. I know that I am a work in progress. I thank God for the second chance at life.